Big Brother 14...Worse Than A Puppet

     Janelle's fans are ranting about her "unfair" eviction. Danielle's haters are lining up to call her out on every lie she's ever told. Opponents of production's interference in the game are threatening to strike in retaliation. It seems to me that the action going on outside the game has become far more interesting than the game itself.

     Not that what's going on now could be called a game. A game requires players. And any shot that we might have had at having some of those was eliminated when Allison Grodner put vets in the house. What we're stuck with instead is a bunch of people hanging out in the Big Brother house waiting to become one of two things, a pawn or collateral damage. I'm starting to think I was better off watching Big Barry and his awful singing over at AGT. *sighs and stoically resigns self to the unavoidable reality of substandard entertainment for the remainder of the summer*

     Speaking of substandard...Julie Chen's "homeskillet" Frank is HOH and has used the power that he lucked into this week to do NOTHING. The puppet wanted to become a player. Too bad the puppet was so enamored with being the other half of ChillTown 2.0 that he didn't notice when master manipulator Boogie turned him into his bitch instead of his partner.

     A player would have used his power to target the vets. A player would have known that Boogie's best shot at winning is sitting next to another vet at the end and seen Boogie's opposition to Frank's wanting to nominate Dan for the self-serving act that it was. But Frank is not a player. He's not even a puppet anymore. He may be off his leash, but he's so well trained that he doesn't need one.
     I won't be watching tonight. Yes, again. And, no, I am not on strike. I just don't care to watch Frank win the POV only to follow his master's commands to keep the floaters on the block. I probably won't even watch tomorrow night to see which one of them goes home, partly because I don't care, but mostly because I'm anxious to avoid the HD version of Frank's and Ashley's "ice cream date". Ewwwwww.
     So tell us what you think. Are you, like me, trawling On Demand in search of entertainment to help you pass the time until Survivor starts? Or are you satisfied with a poor imitation of last season's Big Brother? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...Keeping It Classy

     One down. Three to go.

     The vet posing as a coach posing as everybody's bestie (until she didn't need them anymore) strutted out of the Big Brother house on Thursday night, courtesy of an eight to one vote to evict her. Boogie orchestrated it, the Silent Six executed it, and most of us rejoiced in it. The reasons for it varied, among the house guests and the masses, but the message seemed clear. After all, nothing says, "Get the Hell out" like an eight to one vote.

     To her credit, she managed to keep it classy (albeit a little self-grandizing) until the bitter end, the end being Boogie's good-bye message to her. Do those folks at CBS know which buttons to push or what? Janelle's fans got to see their hero bleeped on national television for calling her biggest adversary a douchebag behind his back, and the rest of us got just another glimpse of the real person beneath the phony facade.
     Which leaves us three vet evictions away from the game that Big Brother was meant to be, the game that we used to be allowed to enjoy, before previous winners and losers (some of them two time, now three time losers) were allowed in and given unfair advantages over the players most of us were tuning in to see.

     Except for Frank. I don't tune in to see Frank. Contrary to the greater good, he is HOH this week and, pursuant to his string puller's wishes, has nominated Wil and Joe for eviction. As if I didn't already have enough reasons to loathe Frank, he goes and puts up other newbies when he should be putting up vets. He wanted to target Dan, but Boogie said no. So he didn't. It seems that I was wrong when I counted Frank as a real player. Not this week anyway. This week he's Boogie's bitch.

     By the way, am I the only one among us that is questioning the "coincidence" of a memory competition to determine HOH every time Frank is eligible to compete? I am referring to the same Frank that sucks at any other type of competition. Just wondering.
     So now we wait. We wait for the outcome of the POV competition and then we wait for the all important decision of whether the POV will be used to save either Wil or Joe. I will be rooting for Wil to win POV and take himself off the block. And then I'll be waiting for someone (Shane is a likely candidate) to convince Frank that eliminating Dan is his and Boogie's best chance to make it to the end. I know, I know...I might as well wish for Reeses Peanut Butter Cups to start falling from the sky.
     So tell us what you're wishing for. And make sure you keep it classy. Just like Janelle.

Big Brother 14...We Have A Rematch

     In one corner, we have Karma, forced to make a return trip to the Big Brother house to finish the work that it began last week. Its primary objective? To rid the house guests (and the rest of us) of the vile cretin that is Frank, AKA Teller of Heinous Lies.

     In the other corner, we have Ironic Justice, also making a repeat appearance, but rather than targeting a lowly minion, its aiming instead for the lowly minion's leader, mean girl and so phony it makes my teeth hurt, Janelle.

     After careful consideration, I've decided that I don't care who emerges victorious. I am an equal opportunity cheerleader this week.
     I have been rooting for Karma to take out Frank since week one when Frank lied about Willie exhibiting homophobic behavior in an attempt to garner votes. The victory would have gone to Karma in last week's match if not for the machinations of Allison Grodner. A win tomorrow night would restore an element of fair play removed from the game last week, and ensure that the aforementioned vile cretin does not benefit from a lie that no one should tell under any circumstances. Go Karma!
     I have been rooting for Ironic Justice since week two when Shane partnered up with Boogie and Frank to target Janelle's team. It just seemed so appropriate that the people planning to go after her were people that she had betrayed (Shane because, as a member of Britney's team, he was no longer useful to Janelle once Boogie's team was in power) or was getting ready to betray (Frank and Boogie because their reign was almost at an end). Janelle is a shameless floater, attaching herself to whoever is currently occupying the HOH room. The over-the-top display of enthusiasm when Danielle won the endurance competition was just this side of ridiculous. Go Ironic Justice!
     Also, and I have been quite vocal about this, the vets should never have been allowed to play. A win for Ironic Justice tomorrow night would mean one less vet in the game. I realize that it was the vets who put Janelle within reach of Ironic Justice and, for this, I am grateful. And perfectly willing to sit back and watch the vets take each other out.
     To say that I'm disappointed in the newbies would be so much more polite than they deserve. The only two that seem to be playing the game (besides the vets) are Shane and Frank (who is so reprehensible that he doesn't count) so, unless the puppets decide to become players and ally themselves with Shane and Frank, these two newbies will be nothing more than pawns to get the vets to the end, where a vet will win. Just like last season.

     There have been reports on Twitter by feeders who have seen puppets Wil, Jenn, and Ashley showing signs of becoming real players, but I refuse to let myself hope. These are the same people who decided to ignore Willie's warning about the "coaches" running the game. It will take more than talk to make a believer out of me.

     I won't be watching tonight's episode. I have zero interest in the edited version of the manipulation of Danielle, the needy, neurotic, and certifiably delusional puppet who will most likely take the credit for Janelle's eviction (if it happens) when it was Boogie and Dan (with a little help from Britney) who have been pulling the strings in the house this week. I might tune in for the last few minutes though. I've seen the screenshots of Janelle looking like she'd been dragged backward through a bush after the POV ceremony, but seeing her in the moment that she realizes that Ironic Justice has snuck up on her arrogant self promises to be entertaining.
     So tell us what you think. Karma or Ironic Justice? Vets or Newbies? Intense psychotherapy or a psychopharmacological cocktail of antipsychotic drugs and antidepressants for Danielle? Or both? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...Same Hell Different Day

     Welcome to a brand new season of Big Brother. We have twelve house guests, all were eligible to compete in the HOH competition and all are playing as individuals for the same $500,000 prize. There are no teams being controlled by "coaches". What we have now is eight newbies and four vets playing the game that the perpetual double-dealer Allison Grodner meant us to have all along, the first three weeks of this season being just a slight of hand that fooled nobody.

     Hang on a sec. A brand new season is not what Julie Chen promised us the other night. She said "reset", and she said it enough times that I know I heard her correctly. So...shouldn't the game have reverted to its original setting? Shouldn't Jodi, Kara, Willie, and JoJo have been restored to the game when it "reset"? It could be that my fair play loving soul is speaking up in protest of something that smacks of underhandedness when it should be shutting the hell up and not questioning the integrity of the shady people trying to sell me a figurative bridge to nowhere. But I don't think so.

     What I perceive to be a glaring error in semantics (and a gross violation of the ethics of fair play) aside, I will try to accept the hand I was dealt. I have a brand new game to watch and it could still be a good one. Right? After all, there is a newbie currently occupying the HOH room and she is unencumbered by nonsense like a CBS engineered twist that would require her to defer to a "coach" because she no longer has one. She also has the power to right some wrongs, starting with those vets that Allison Grodner brought in disguised as coaches. I say put two of them on the block (my picks would be Janelle and Boogie) and then renom another vet if one of the nominees wins POV. Simple, yes? The newbies have the numbers to eliminate the vets (have I mentioned that they outnumber them two to one?), and, if my calculations are correct, they could do it quickly because it appears that CBS has screwed itself into needing two double evictions in order to end this season on time. Right? I can't help visualizing two vets, keyless and miserable, at the end of the Nomination Ceremony and I smile in anticipation of tonight's episode.

     My brief visit to the Happy Land of Delusions ends abruptly (and meanly) thanks to my perpetual enemy Harsh Dose of Reality. One of my sources, who had been lurking over my shoulder while I was typing, began snickering. When confronted, he tells me that Wil and Frank are on the block and then confirms my suspicion that Dan had something to do with it. *looks around for something to throw*
     So, the brand new game is just the same game that was being played before the "reset". The vets are controlling the game and the newbies are letting them. Sounds an awful lot like last season to me.

     My sources tell me not to give up on the newbies yet because Danielle won the POV. *laughs and makes sarcastic remarks until sources threaten to leave* Okay. So what will Danielle do with this power? Probably whatever she's told to do with it by Ex "Coach" Dan and her make-believe honey pie, Shane. Based on what we've seen so far, I think this is a fair assumption. But then I learn that Boogie has made a convincing argument for taking down one of the nominees and renoming Janelle, and Danielle is considering it. This is good. This means that not all hope is lost, but it does depend on the whims of a wishy-washy newbie still operating in puppet mode and desperately seeking the approval of the temporary men in her temporary life. *sighs deeply and begins counting the days until Survivor starts*

     So tell us what you think. Does the "reset" seem like a rerun to you? Am I wrong for thinking that targeting the vets is the obvious choice? And what about the POV? What do you think Dan and Shane will tell Danielle to do with it? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...Karma vs. Ironic Justice

     First, a few words to CBS regarding last night's episode. Stop editing Danielle's shameless and pathetic stalking of Shane into a showmance. You cannot turn a desperate woman clinging to an indifferent man into Jeff and Jordan. After enduring two seasons of Brenchel, most of us are still too nauseated to ever want to see anything that even slightly resembles two people attempting to couple. Thank you.

     Speaking of last night's episode, watching Janelle take credit for Frank being Shane's renom made me giggle. She was so full of her own cleverness, claiming to be the puppet master pulling the strings this week. No Janelle. No. It was Ian, incapable of talking game without Boogie there to do his talking for him, that triggered Britney's hair trigger paranoia and put Frank's life in the Big Brother house in peril. Incompetence gets the credit, not Janelle's lame offer of her jewelry as hostage in exchange for her loyalty to Shane and Britney.

     Which brings me to what promises to be the happiest moment of the season for me...the eviction of that loathsome excuse for a human being, Frank. Not that seeing Janelle at the mercy of Ironic Justice doesn't have its appeal, but Karma backdooring Frank is just so much better. I want to see him shocked and upset and parked next to Julie, who will, hopefully, do her job and pressure him to name the dysfunction that compelled him to lie about Willie being homophobic. Make him accountable Julie. We're counting on you.

     Of course, the inexplicable could happen and somebody (hopelessly in love with the idea of being in love Danielle, the probable swing vote) could decide to vote to evict Joe instead. While this is clearly not my favorite scenario, I could get all right with it fairly quickly. Joe's eviction would mean I would not have to tolerate that boorish shit stirrer shouting at me from my television any more. Not a bad thing. I also wouldn't mind Julie asking him if his troublemaking ways are genetic or a learned behavior. Anything that brings us a step closer to settling the nature vs. nurture debate is always welcome.
     Either way, tonight's eviction will eliminate someone that doesn't deserve to win; Frank, because he shouldn't benefit from that particular lie, and Joe, because being an asshole doesn't make him a worthy competitor, it just makes him an asshole. Too bad they both couldn't be kicked out the door with one vote. I wonder what kind of special power CBS could pretend that America granted could make that happen. I bet  I could think of one in the time that it takes me to fetch the mail. It can't be that hard. Allison Grodner does it all the time.
     So tell us what you think. Who do you want gone? And how much fun would you have watching Julie torture him until he breaks and begs forgiveness for his despicable behavior. You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...A Puppet Becomes A Real Player

     Before I begin, I have two things to say to CBS.

     First, repeatedly showing your heavily edited footage of Willie Hantz's expulsion does not make those of us that possess more than the iota of common sense that you credit us with any more inclined to believe your version of the events that took place. It's true that the man is not a saint. He made mistakes out of frustration and perhaps a misguided belief that he could save the other members of his team even though they had outcasted him for something he did not do. He was provoked and he reacted in ways that we have seen house guests of seasons past behave without consequences. He is not, however, the monster that you keep trying to edit him into, so just stop it. It only makes you look bad.

     Second, and again I refer to the common sense that you seem to think we all lack, DO NOT force the "coaches" on us as valid players and pretend that we voted for them to enter the game. The coaches twist is the twist that never was. It is the excuse you used to make bringing in returning house guests more palatable for the fans who have repeatedly voiced our opinions (to no avail) regarding ringers forcing a game on us that we don't want to see. Let the newbies play the game they signed up for, and give the fans the game we want to see. History tells us that you won't. History tells us that you will probably do what most of us have suspected you would all along and allow the "coaches" into the game. We can't stop you. But pretending that it is something that we voted for will cost you what little credibility you have left, so do so at your own peril.

     And now for the first happy news that we've had from the Big Brother house since Willie's attempt to take the game back from the "coaches". The puppet masters have lost control of one of their puppets. Shane has managed to cut his strings and is running amok, to the chagrin of those that thought they were in charge of things this week. *starts hunting through emails for Barnes and Noble coupons*
     After doing his "coach's" bidding for the last two weeks, I didn't want to let myself hope that Shane would make good on the deal he struck with Boogie and Frank to target Janelle and her team. But that is exactly what he appears to be doing, and on his own terms.

     Apparently, his "coach" wanted Frank on the block as payback for Shane's nomination for eviction last week. Suck it Britney. Your one remaining puppet is emerging as a real player in the game that you've been playing for yourself. *begins printing coupons in happy anticipation of celebratory book buying and yummy coffee slurping* He has forged an alliance that you know nothing about and could possibly go to the end if he continues to ignore you when you speak.

     It seems that Boogie also expected Frank, his strongest player, to go up on the block to keep suspicion from falling upon their secret alliance with Shane. But Shane is not taking orders from him either. The HOH is running the house this week, not the "coaches", and order has been briefly restored to the universe.
     Hopefully, the other puppets are taking note, and one day soon we will have a house full of real players ready to take on the "coaches" that CBS will no doubt "officially" allow into the game on Thursday night. Unfortunately, the puppets seem content to be puppets and will likely remain so, the possible exceptions being Frank, who is vile and therefore dead to me, and Danielle, who only seems to be willing to trade one puppet master ("Coach" Dan) for another (Shane).
     So tell us what you think. Are you fed up with CBS's insults to our intelligence? Does Shane's transformation from puppet to real player give you hope that the others will follow his example? Or will Shane be taking on the "coaches" alone? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.    

Big Brother 14...No Honor Among Puppet Masters

     Last night's episode began with a rerun of CBS's self-serving edit of Willie's expulsion. This was immediately followed by a disgusting display of self-pity by that sorry excuse for a "coach" Britney, who promptly burst into tears and required comforting. As if that wasn't nauseating enough, we were then treated to a shot of Britney's fickle bestie Janelle celebrating with her alliance of the week, Boogie and his protege Frank.

     This evidence of Janelle breaking her sworn promise to Britney that she loathed Boogie and would never work with him under any circumstances was not what made this little scene difficult to watch. After all, Janelle made that promise way back in Week 1 when she was helping "Coach" Britney run the house. This is Week 2 and Britney is just another "coach" that doesn't have any power and is persona non grata (that means betrayed, scapegoated, and targeted and seems awfully familiar) in the house, and Janelle's special skills are now needed to help a different "coach" run the house. The logic is sound and this kind of cut-throat play is part of life in the Big Brother house. What made me gag was the genuine glee with which she pranced and bopped with someone she can't stand (Boogie) and someone she had said she wanted evicted (Frank), not just once but several times during the incessant indecision that was the hallmark of Week 1. Watching that woman in action is nothing short of disturbing.
     And then a conversation between Boogie, Frank, and Shane led to a deal that made me smile. The three of them are going to work together to take Janelle and her team down. It seems that Ironic Justice is going to be awfully busy in the near future. It is coming for Janelle disguised as Boogie and is already hard at work making Britney miserable, which she is mistakenly and predictably blaming on Willie. We just have to wait for Karma to arrive on a Search and Destroy mission with Frank as It's target and then it will be a party.
     Which leaves "Coach" Dan, who will be eliminated from the game tonight if his last remaining team member, Danielle, is evicted. He is a coach in real life, which made his speech to Danielle, declaring her to be on her own without any help from him, seem really mean and him incompetent. And then he explained to us during DR that this was a "tactic" designed to "make her fight harder". What it did was make her cry. A lot. The "tactic" gets a big fat F. The "coach" can have a D and some advice. Take the time to get to know your players well enough to know which coaching "tactics" from the Big Brother Coaching For Dummies Handbook will work on them. Not all puppets, er players, are the same.
     So, tell us what you think of last night's episode. Does the "coaches" turning on each other make you smile? And wouldn't their preoccupation with each other provide the best opportunity for the puppets to become real players and take over the house? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...Some More Words About The Willie Hantz Expulsion

     Before I get to the travesty that was CBS's version of events that led up to the expulsion of Willie Hantz, let me just issue the following warning. I am in full blown menopausal misery (for the record, I am way too young for this shit) during the hottest summer suffered here since 1988, and I am in no mood to set an example for anybody. My favorite child will just have to do as I say and not as I do regarding this one thing.
     That said, let's kick some ass.

     Instigating Bitch. The CBS edit neglected to show us, or didn't want us to see, one of Big Brother's favorite darlings encouraging Joe to push Willie's buttons in an effort to detonate the walking talking time bomb that was Willie during his final days in the house. Janelle has been the disloyal pot calling the disloyal kettle names this season, but she has not done anything to make herself unlikable. Until now.

     Narcissistic Bitch. "Coach" Britney set it all in motion, then disavowed her own player in what was the most cold-hearted, self-serving move in Big Brother history. The exchange between Britney and Willie in the lounge was a glaring example of what being a member of Team Britney really means...getting mercilessly bitched out and blamed for what its supposed leader caused through self-serving actions.

     Obnoxious Troublemaking Asshole. Always eager to be part of the problem, Joe volunteers to trigger Willie's temper and, if I have been correctly informed, CBS heavily edited Joe's actions in this endeavor, probably so the fans wouldn't hate him more than we already do. After that awful performance he gave pretending that Willie hurt him, CBS needn't have bothered. It's way past too late for Joe.

     Lying Prick. One day, hopefully soon, Karma will unload a bazooka aimed at Frank's ass. And the malicious lie that he told about Willie will be the reason why.

     Culpable As Hell. CBS employs Allison Grodner and her herd of incompetents so, ultimately, they are responsible for the loathsome way that Willie's repeated attempts to seek help in the DR were ignored by production, and conveniently edited out of last night's episode. Editing Willie's exit in a way that makes them appear competent, doesn't make them so. The truth will always be the truth, no matter how it's spun.
     Now it's your turn to kick a little ass. You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...Hell Has Been Raised

     How does one celebrate such delicious news? I know how it would have gone down in the days before I had a teenage daughter to set a good example for, but these days I will just have to settle for a trip to Barnes and Noble where I will purchase books with reckless abandon ( that means without concerning myself about such trivial matters as cost or where the hell I'm going to put them) and indulge in the biggest white chocolate mocha I can get Starbucks to sell me. Heaven. Absolute Heaven.
     So what, may you ask, has me in such a celebratory mood when what I should be doing is plotting my escape from the pit of despair that Sunday night's episode of Big Brother cast me into? Well, my informant tells me that the newbies are in full on rebellion mode and hell has not only been raised but it is tearing through the Big Brother house with a wicked fury that is delightful to behold.
     Not that I don't trust my daughter to deal straight with me about something this important (I do control her allowance and her freedom after all), but one of my hard and fast rules is to always verify the validity of a juicy rumor before spreading it. So, what should have been a glamorous morning spent cleaning bathrooms and Hoovering an appalling amount of dog hair from the carpets was invested instead in a search for the truth, which, HALLELUJAH and thank you very much, was posted in all my favorite blogs and will be summarized for you here. For all the gloriously gory details check out any of the fine Big Brother blogs scattered about for your entertainment. I will be posting a list of my favorites as soon as I get the Blogger widget thingy all figured out.
     As I understand it, Britney, suffering from diarrhea of the mouth, blabbed to Willie hers and Janelle's theory that the coaches would be entering the game at some point. Incensed over being used by the coaches to further their own game, Willie calls a newbies only house meeting and, faster than you can say Russell Hantz's brother, he has the troops whipped into a coach hating frenzy and ready to do battle for their right to play for a half million dollars without interference from the hasbeens that were foisted on them by a double dealing CBS.
     While it's true that the newbies' shift to DEFCON 2 (that's war readiness for those of you whose fathers weren't in the Air Force) would not go unnoticed by the "coaches" for long, they were alerted unnecessarily early by Joe, who apparently suffers from the same affliction as Britney, and now it's on.

     What happened next was probably the result of one man's crusade to put an end to the newbie rebellion that he opposes for reasons I cannot fathom. Joe attempts to take out its fearless leader by pouring Willie's risky secret plan involving Thursday night's vote into Frank's ear. While reassuring Frank that he will not be evicted this week, Willie apparently does a passable imitation of Wil's southern accent, which then triggers the kind of shitstorm seldom seen outside of anywhere that adolescents congregate and, of course, the Big Brother house.

     I doubt that even Frank knows what drove him to do what he does next, but straight to blabbermouth Joe he goes and tells him, get this, that Willie made fun of Wil for being gay. Joe, Big Brother's resident shit stirrer, can't wait to open his big fat mouth and repeat this blatant lie to EVERYBODY.
     The result is the aforementioned shitstorm. Willie gets labeled a homophobe in absentia (he's up in the HOH room oblivious to the beating that his good name is taking) and the house gets to planning his lynching.

     Once somebody, I think it was Britney blabbing something she should for a change, clues Willie in, it doesn't take long for him to get himself out to the yard and call Frank out for the liar that he is in front of everybody, except for Ian who seems to be living mostly in whatever reality show is going on inside his head. Even Boogie and Dan are present and awake for a change. Apparently what ensued should not be missed by anyone and it is my sincere wish that CBS bless us with it in it's entirety before the vote tomorrow night.
     So tell us what you think. Does a potential rebellion make you want to celebrate in your favorite way? If so, are you concerned that yesterday's drama in the yard will end the rebellion before it even gets going? And what about all the excessive running off at the mouth that these people are doing? Is it bugging you yet, or are you loving the fallout from it? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

Big Brother 14...A Twist Gone Horribly Wrong

     Big Brother took a great big whizz in my Cinnamon Toast Crunch Sunday night. My fear that this summer's game would be played by the four returning house guests, rather than the newbies, was confirmed in spectacular high definition as what was supposed to be a mere twist morphed into the main event. The "coaches" have made the game all about them and the newbies are letting them.
     Britney and Janelle have teamed up to avenge the losses they both suffered in their seasons to guys that they attempted to use to get them to the end. The users got used by players better than them at that particular game, plain and simple. But these ladies don't see it that way. They see themselves as victims and, to them, this season is nothing more than an opportunity (that they are entitled to by the way) to take what had been so unfairly denied to them previously. So now we have Team Sour Grapes setting themselves in opposition to Boogie and Dan, who must work together or perish.

     If any proof was needed that the "coaches" are running this game, one need look no further than the two newbies, Kara and Frank, sitting on the Block, victims of a plot hatched by Team Sour Grapes intended to turn Dan and Boogie against each other. Kara is a member of Team Dan and Frank team Boogie and, if they are both unfortunate enough to remain on the Block, their fate will be determined by the brain trust powering Team Sour Grapes. It will come down to whether Britney wants Kara gone, as a step closer to eliminating Dan from the game, more than Janelle wants to settle an old grudge with Boogie, which would send Frank out the door.

     Even more frustrating to me than the self-serving "coaches" is the complacent (because they're starstruck?), almost animatronic newbies who are behaving as though they exist in the Big Brother house merely to do the "coaches" bidding. Willie is just a figurehead up in the HOH room, Kara's and Frank's asses are on the Block because Britney and Janelle wanted them there, and if what I've been told is true (my daughter watches BBAD; she's a teenager, she stays up all night and sleeps all day), the POV winner does exactly what his "coaches" tell him to do. If the puppets, uh newbies, continue in this vein, this season will be unwatchable.
     So I'm taking it back. CBS did NOT get it right. Like a benevolent Santa they bestowed upon us what promised to be a successful twist, but then all Grinchlike they sabotaged our Christmas in July present by dumping "coaches" with their own agendas into the middle of what could have been a great game. Not cool CBS. Y'all need to fix this pronto. I don't care how. Embrace that Nike slogan and Just Do It.
     One last thing. Ian has joined Ashley on my short list of newbies that I would like to see sitting next to that Jeff Probst wannabe Julie Chen ASAP. He is a creeper. He tippytoes around the house talking to himself and behaving weirdly. He lurks pervelike in the bathroom hoping to get a glimpse of naked lady parts. According to my BBAD source, he asked Ashley for a date and she accepted. I knew there was something wrong with her.
     So tell us what you think of this CBS engineered clusterfuck. Do you want to see the "coaches" booted out on their self-serving asses? Or are you enjoying the Team Sour Grapes vs. Team Play Dead show? You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.

***I would like to extend my gratitude to the folks at Big Brother Junkies for the photo of Willie Hantz. It pretty much says it all, doesn't it. HOH indeed.***

Big Brother 14...Let The Hell Raising Begin

     All hail Big Brother. Thus far, this has been the summer of suck. The Closer is airing its final episodes (depressing), the storylines over at True Blood are lame and boring (annoying), and my used to be favorite judge on America's Got Talent forced a zero talent "singer" named Big Barry (who isn't big by any stretch of the imagination) on a very pissed off America who didn't appreciate some of their favorites being sent home to make room for him (depressing and annoying). Howard Stern has it right. Howie Mandel owes us an apology. And until we get one I'm boycotting AGT, which doesn't leave me with much to keep me entertained and out of trouble, unless, of course, Big Brother doesn't suck again this summer. So please, please, please don't let what I saw the other night be just my poor desperate mind playing tricks on me because it showed all the signs of being this summer's one saving grace and my own personal salvation.
     This season is showing some real promise. It began with a great big resounding HOORAY when it was revealed that none of the four returning house guests were--let me see...what did I call her before...oh yeah--that vile woman with a borderline personality disorder and an intensely annoying, whiny teenage girl voice. A Big Brother season without Rachel Reilly is a good season. Period.
     I also have to say that, as far as twists go, having the returning houseguests mentor the newbies has definite possibilities, providing that the game doesn't become a competition between the coaches with the newbies nothing more than collateral damage as the coaches settle old grudges or stroke their own egos.
     It's tough to call after only one episode (I don't subscribe to the Live Feeds, I just don't have that kind of time, and BBAD is on way past my bedtime), but the newbies seem likeable enough, except for Ashley, owner of a mobile spray tanning company, who makes me cringe every time she speaks and the vets, Britney (Season 12), Mike Boogie (Season 2 player and Season 7 winner), Janelle (Seasons 6 and 7), and Dan (Season 10 winner), have proven themselves entertaining in the past, well, except for Dan who flew under the radar in his season by becoming one with the furniture, so I believe we have reason to hope that this season will turn out to be a good one. After the last two seasons, there really is nowhere to go but up, but being Rachelless and possessing a twist with potential has already lifted the current season above trash level (Seasons 12 and 13) and mediocrity (Season 11). I will be practicing optimism (translation: hoping for the best as I brace myself for the worst) as I watch tonight's show.
     So, tell us what you think. Is there reason to hope, or have you seen something that has made you swear off this season already? And what about those coaches? Did CBS get it right? For the record, I think they did and I hope Britney and her team kick some serious ass this summer. You've seen it. It's fair game. Let's talk about it.